If you’ve been following the recent news, you know that Tibet is having a terrible time right now. (If you don’t, the BBC has a good rundown.)

I’ve been trying to find the words to express how angry and sad and frustrated I have been since this violence started.  It is a very strange feeling to look at pictures coming out of Lhasa and recognize in the burnt-out shells places I and my classmates passed every day for three weeks. Yahoo has an extensive photo gallery of Lhasa and Tibetan protests. In the rubble, so far I’ve recognized a teashop in which I got a wonderful cup of tea, a little Chinese dumpling shop that would belch out the noxious fumes of cooking cabbage and unidentifiable meat, and various shops near the Barkhor. Of course, we can’t contact any of the people we met in Tibet, so we don’t know if they are safe or not.

Perhaps the most perplexing and frustrating thing is China’s absolute stubbornness and refusal to let Tibet go. It’s reminiscent in a way of the Exodus story from the Christian Bible; the more people beg, the more Beijing hardens its heart.

Chinese commenters on the internet are just as infuriating. They insist that without China, Tibet would be a backwards hick country, and that the global protests are a result of the Dalai Lama’s brainwashing. If you try to discuss this with them, and they find out you’re from America, they of course bring up the horrible things we did to the Native Americans, and the African Americans, and the Central and South Americans, and, well, pretty much everybody. And I don’t really mind that; I’ll discuss that stuff all day. I’ve got a good healthy dose of white guilt about ‘most everything the US has done, and I’ll be the first to admit that we shouldn’t have done any of it. The thing that gets me is, the Chinese commenters seem to be using our actions as justification of theirs; it’s as if they’re saying “Well, you did this to your people; why are you getting in our faces when we do it to our people?” Many of us have learned that this is not the way to treat people. We would like to try to help others learn from our mistakes so that oppressed people don’t have to suffer. Certainly we don’t want the horrific things we did to the Native Americans to be an example of how a country should act.

There’s also an overwhelming response of “why don’t you mind your own business?” And this is another area in which America shouldn’t be an example, but rather a warning. Five years ago, our president stood up in front of the world and said, I don’t care what you think; we are going to war; and if you don’t like it, mind yer own damn business. And what has it gotten us? Thousands of unnecessary casualties, exposure of the lies of our administration, a lack of confidence in and pride for our country, and on top of that, nobody else on the planet likes us. We are coming to realize that we need the world’s support. This is something that China does not seem to grasp yet. (Hopefully, when this year’s Olympic Games become the lowest-rated broadcast since the last Stephen King TV movie, they will begin to understand.)

Since we started even discussing the Tibet trip, I’ve tried to be mindful of the everyday Chinese men and women, who I could not believe would wholeheartedly swallow the lies of their government. I tried to remember that there were plenty of people in America who understood that our government was lying through their teeth, and that we must surely have counterparts in China. If they are there, they’re not speaking very loudly. All I’ve seen is “mind your own business, Tibet is ours.” (If you know of a place where I can read an opposing viewpoint from China, please, let me know in comments.)

Here’s the bottom line for me. It shouldn’t matter that China has brought various modernizing technologies to Tibet. It shouldn’t matter that a lucky few Tibetans are living better now. It shouldn’t even matter that Tibet was a theocracy before, and would have a bit of work to do to keep from returning to theocracy if it were independent. What should matter is that the vast majority of Tibetans want to go home. They want to govern themselves. So what if we think they’re not doing it right? Let them do it. China seems to feel very paternal toward Tibet; another argument I’ve seen is “without us, Tibet is nothing”. This denies that Tibetans have the brains to do for themselves, which I have seen firsthand that they can do whatever they want. They’re just people, just like the rest of us, and all they want is the freedom to do what they want however they want to do it. What is so bad about that? Why is that so hard for China to accept? What are they losing if Tibet is free?

I bought a little statuette of Manjushri on the Barkhor, and now it sits on my desk at work, promising to smite ignorance with the flaming sword of gnosis. But sometimes, it sure is hard to believe that ignorance is anything but eternal and all-pervasive.

I hope that Tibet will find peace before Beijing slaughters all the remaining Tibetans.